Underneath The Mask

Self Harm This is quite a sore subject (excuse the pun). However it is an area of mental health which I feel there is still a lot of stigma around, and lack of understanding.  A lot of people do not understand self harm, or why people do it, why they would mutilate their body, and how this act helps them in any way. Well...there are lots of reasons why people feel the impulse to self harm, to feel physical pain. I was 11 years old, when I first cut myself. I cant remember the details as to where and how, I am pretty sure I used a razor. I had no intent to end my life, the wounds were not located anywhere dangerous, although they felt deep. This act of self mutilation became an on-going activity, if you want to call it that. I would cut my arms, wrists, ribs, thighs, hands...for many years. Although you wouldn't be able to tell now if you looked at me. That part of my life is behind me and the scars have now faded away to almost nothing.  There were many re...

My Mental Health Illnesses My journey began when I was 10 but took a massive dive by 11 years of age. That was when I had it. That 'it' being Severe Clinical Depression, I also suffer with Generalised Anxiety Disorder (GAD). It took a while to come to terms with this, to grasp an understanding of two things that, at that age...I knew very little about.  I was self harming from 11 also. A young age to be mutilating and causing physical damage.  By 14 years old I was put on fluoxetine, a prozac anti-depressant medication, and have been on a-ray of different medication ever since. To this day, I am still fighting the battle and have been everyday, but can say after the many things I have tried, many coping mechanisms I have built up, distraction techniques found. I have been coping and dealing with it all differently to my clueless younger self. My mental health troubles have haunted me since I was 10. Now almost 26 it still continues to show up and condemn me. ...

Lets Talk Mental Health So when I thought about starting a blog, I began with a blog about beauty...ranging from product reviews to tutorials. I titled this 'The Confessions of a Beauty Addict', and I didn't post much/often. But the truth is, the real confession of 'this' beauty addict, is hiding what is underneath, to paint a picture of confidence which I feel society would accept, to make myself feel I am anything beautiful. My name is Nikkita. I work in mental health, I have suffered with it much longer. Without a degree in Mental Health, I suppose I am considered an 'expert by experience'? I am not sure, however I am confident when I am at work...when I am helping others suffering with complex care needs, dark journeys, deep mental health struggles etc etc. Feel free to ask me why.  I won't delve too deep into my own journey in the intro. And I don't know why I am even writing a blog about the mental health we suffer with so indivi...